Cassandra’s Review

Oh my God, are you serious Chris?! I’ve never seen a more pathetic cock than yours. How would I bust your cock and balls…. I fell like you need to have them first. If you want to dignify it with the title of a cock. That’s closer to a pussy if you ask me. Trust me, no girl would ever attempt to fuck that because it would be a waste of her time! That wouldn’t even go past her pussy lips!! That poor, sad excuse for a dick probably wouldn’t even make it past my teeth! What the fuck kind of sick joke would it be to get me all the way home before telling me that you’ve got a pussy where your cock should be. Not even that, a pussy would be more fun to play with than that thing. I probably couldn’t do anything other than laugh. Seriously though, thanks for the laugh!! I can’t believe you would want to post this publicly. It’s so tiny! I could just name this one little squishy. It reminds me of a little red button. I just wanna push it in and see how long it takes for it to pop back out to normal size. If you’re hard in all of these pics, does it just go back up inside of you when you’re soft? OH MY GOD THIS IS HILARIOUS!!

cass

Zoey’s Review

Wait, let me go get my magnifying glass before I start my rating… Wait, that doesn’t help. Now I can just get an up close look at how pathetic you look. Is that a penis? Surely not. It’s so small. It looks like a button that I wanna push in with my finger and see how long it takes to pop back up. Oh my gosh Chris, this is hilarious. How can anyone take you seriously in the bedroom? It’s so small that I don’t even know what to do with it. I’m not even sure I could get it in my mouth because it’s so small. I’m glad you didn’t actually take me home, because I can’t think of a bigger let down than rubbing against your pants and not even feeling a bulge to pulling down your pants to reveal this. You say “pull” out, but I don’t think you could pull that little pathetic cock out of anything, and I’m sure you won’t be anytime soon. How do you jerk off? It’s so short I don’t even think your fingers would be able to stroke it. Tweezers maybe? I’m moving on now. I’d rather spend my time looking at real men.

zoey

Vivianna’s Review

HA! I know why they sent your pathetic little cock to me since I love such big cock and yours is far from anything I would be caught dead looking at if I didn’t have to. Why would you force us to look at such a pathetic cock? I love that you want weird shit done to you and want you shit fucked up. Problem is, I’m not sure there is enough there to do any damage… I cannot believe I have to look at this. It’s so small! I wish I could see it in person! I would like to compare it to the size of my pinky toe!!! Hahaha! I really needed a good laugh today, and yours surely didn’t disappoint in that category, even though it is sure to disappoint in every other one. Do you seriously take girls home? I feel so sorry for them. Do you at least warn them about your embarrassingly small cock before taking them home? Or do you just surprise them with that little thing you call a dick? If you were to take me home without warning me, I would be very pissed. I better have gotten a damn good meal, some really good conversation, and if I’ve wasted this much of my time, I would like to be able to cum too. I really hope you at least know a little bit about what you’re doing with your hands. I’m done looking at this pathetic dick now.

Viv