Mary’s Review

Hi Bendy, I’m laughing out loud at the pathetic and ugly looking cock you have! What on earth makes a cock be able to bend completely over while it’s hard? Can that even attempt to get into a pussy? Umm, yes, it would most definitely collapse like a soda can and leave your woman utterly unsatisfied! What kind of woman would want to be with a dude who can’t even perform correctly? I bet all your previous girlfriends have talked behind your back and spread the news that your cock sucks and now you can barely get a date with anyone with your bendy cock reputation! You must feel like such a loser! It is one of the ugliest looking cocks I’ve ever seen. Not just because  it bends in half, but hello? Why do you have a big bush growing down there? Surely one of the women you’ve been with has been kind enough to tell you to help yourself out and shave the jungle in your pants….? Or probably not because she couldn’t get over the fact that you have a useless cock and decided to end things right away and find a guy with a real cock to please her! Poor you and your little bendy cock! It actually looks somewhat decent in girth and length, but I guess that doesn’t matter when you can’t even keep it hard enough to slide into a pussy anyway. I think what your sad dick needs is a goddess to own it so she can lock it up and use it to her advantage by making you pay to get unlocked. That’s the only way she’d be getting pleasure from that loser cock, by getting to buy things with the “cock” money because you know it isn’t going to be pleasing her where it counts! 1/5 stars.

Mary

Mia’s Review

You call yourself Bendy? Wow, that is the most interesting dick I’ve ever looked at! I’m wracking my brain trying to figure out how that doesn’t hurt to bend all the way over like that! What the fuck? Maybe you should join the circus and do tricks with your weird dick! “Now folks, what we have here is the world’s weirdest dick! Think it’s going to break? Think again! It’s Bendy!” I can imagine all the laughing and scoffing you’d get right now! Not only that, but the pitying looks you’d receive from all the women and men who know how sad and lonely your life is with a dick that weird! I don’t know if you could even try thrusting into a pussy because it probably can’t even go in without bending up on itself! How do you even masturbate and get your own self off with a bendable dick like that? With a dick like that, masturbating is probably all you can even attempt to do since a pussy isn’t going to come in contact with that disgusting thing! Didn’t you ever see other guys in the locker room and notice they aren’t hairy beasts? Come on, simple care of the pubic region is a given. No one wants to look at a big pile of hair all over the already weird looking junk! You’re going to have to take out the bush shears or a weed whacker to get control of that mess! Gawd, can you be any more of a loser?! Bendy dick and hairy dick is not a good combination if you eve want to get laid! 0.5/5 stars

Mia